Cuts Like a Knife

I just got back from my vacation, and I should be on cloud nine right now. I've been to 22 consecutive Indy 500's, and this year's race was the most exciting I've seen. Sam Hornish, Jr. making a pass on Marco Andretti in the final straightaway for the win, it just doesn't get any better than that. But instead, I'm feeling lower than low. I was looking through the local paper from when I was gone, and came across the wedding announcements. There in black and white was the woman who I've been in love with for over two years now, engaged to someone else. I'm just kind of numb right now. I guess on one level I've always known nothing would come between us. But I allowed some part of me to foolishly believe that somehow, someway we would end up together. I clung to this fantasy for so long, it just makes this hurt even more. I really just solidifies my fears that I'll never find anyone, that I'll end up alone. I'm 29 years old, and the Big 3-0 is closing in rapidly. I'm just so tired of being lonely.